Accepted Lock

Who’s Locked Up In Your Inner Dungeon? by Anne Marie Bennett

Sometimes I visualize all of my “inner voices” as residing in a big castle. Each one has its own room and sometimes I visualize (in meditation or in writing) myself there, exploring the rooms and the part of me that inhabits each one.

One day a few weeks ago while “exploring” my inner castle, I found myself in the dungeon, so to speak, and guess what? There are some parts of me that I’ve locked up down there because other parts have been stronger, or because I just haven’t known how to interact with them.

My Angry One is one of those parts. I don’t have a name for her yet (except Angry One), but I am getting to know her a little bit better day by day.

She has given me some very interesting information as I’ve been working with her. For example, she reminded me that I didn’t exactly grow up with very good role models for expressing anger (my mother lashed out with hers, and my father kept his under lock and key). She helped me to see that I chose to follow my father’s anger pattern because it wasn’t as hurtful to others.

The most exciting revelation, however, came when I asked her What do you have to give me? and she replied, I give you a signal that something isn’t right in your world. I give you the knowledge that anger is okay and acceptable. I give you a sense of responsibility to try to fix whatever is making you angry. I give you energy to right wrongs and to speak up for yourself in situations where no one is listening to you.

One day last week I imagined myself taking her hand in the dungeon and inviting her to go with me “upstairs” into my world and into my life. “Just for the day,” I promised her. I can’t even begin to tell you what a difference it made!

And it just so happened that that very same day, my husband did something that REALLY angered me on a very deep level (not just surface stuff being activated, but many years of stepfamily issues rising to the surface). And as I was feeling my blood boil, I remembered The Angry One and that she was with/beside me for the day….. It was as if she really had been set free. I was able to speak my anger to my husband without being consumed by it, and believe me…. this was a brand new experience for me.

Try This Today: Make a commitment to pay attention to your own inner Angry One this week. Are you comfortable allowing him/her to walk through your day with you, or is she/he locked up in your own inner dungeon? Find a way this week to honor this angry voice inside of you: spend a few minutes listening to it in a journaled dialogue, or simply make a little extra room for it in the “upstairs” of your soul. And if this whole idea of an inner castle and dungeon intrigues you…. I challenge you to take your inner wise self with you and go down to that dungeon. And notice, just notice (don’t do anything yet) if there are any other parts of you locked up down there.

About the Author

Anne Marie Bennett is a writer, SoulCollage® facilitator & artist who enjoys playing with color & words. She feels closest to her own soul when she is writing, creating art, & sharing the gift of SoulCollage® with others. Anne Marie lives, writes, laughs, sings (and creates her own SoulCollage® cards!) in Massachusetts. If you’re curious about SoulCollage®, please visit www.KaleidoSoul.com
Operating the 4680DBLK and 4680DNKL TSA – Accepted Padlocks